To prove to you that I can help you learn how to be happy by the end of this, I want to show you that I started where you might be right now.
I have been in every emotional roller coaster state from severely depressed to contemplating suicide weekly.
My mom gave me up for adoption at 5 and my dad died not long after. I was put onto the medications Zoloft (for depression) Depicote and Ritalin.
I was placed in behavior homes for years and then behavior schools with the baddest kids in south side Chicago.
I used to be bulimic from getting picked on at school and I was getting beat up daily until I learned how to defend myself.
I got in so many fights from my anger issues and my environment being so bad I graduated 8th grade with a black eye.
After high school I lived in homeless shelters, trap houses and flop houses.
At 19 I broke some serious laws out of anger, went to jail and then was ordered to 2 years of court ordered anger management weekly.
I couldn’t stand living life unhappy and depressed. So I worked my butt off and have gotten to the place I am now with record label deals, iTunes Top 100 Albums and placements on every major site from being interviewed by TMZ to MSNBC.
I now take my life story and use it to inspire people to teach them how to be happy and chase their dreams.
If I wasn’t a happy person, there is no way I could have endured everything I have and still be happy enough to want to help the world after it chewed me up and spit me out.
Learn How To Be Happy Or Else!
I can tell you right now that learning how to be happy today will change your life for the better FOREVER.
When you learn how to be happy you will enjoy every moment in life so much more. You will appreciate things, be more grateful and look at everything in a whole new light.
I used to be so angry at the world, I used to snap at the flip of a switch, punch walls, break inanimate objects and just be… well an unhappy person.
I even broke my wrist on wall one time. I can’t even do normal push ups now because my wrist won’t bend back and we were so poor I couldn’t afford go to the hospital. So we got a soft cast from Walgreens for $15 and my wrist healed funny.
I’ve been at the bottom end of the happiness spectrum and I can tell you the feeling is not anywhere near the feeling of being happy.
The sheer feeling change alone is worth finding out how to be happy in your life.
Even the most enjoyable moments in life won’t do anything for you unless you learn how to be happy to actually see them from the right perspective.
The thought of happiness is powerful. There is a reason a song like ‘Happy’ from Pharrell has nearly 1 Billion Views and won so many awards.
When you watch this video, doesn’t it make you happy to see all those other people happy? If not, we have a bit more work to do but by the end of this you will understand how to be happier.
Neuroplasticity And Happiness
In case you are thinking to yourself that you can’t learn how to be happy, I want to show you something that will prove that negative thought wrong.
Neuroplasticity shows that your brain can be completely rewired from any state of mind that it is currently in.
You can take it from happy to sad or unhappy to happy by simply doing things over time to rewire your brain to give you happiness.
Therefore, it is COMPLETELY possible for you to rewire your brain and train yourself how to be happy.
I mean, If I found a way to happiness, you can definitely find happiness for yourself!
The Mindset Of How To Be Happy
When it comes to finding out how to be happy you need to understand how things work in your body and mind a bit.
Doing this will allow you to break down the issue and deal with it so you can instantly be happier in any situation where you start feeling sad or depressed.
This is how I fixed my sadness and how I fight any type of negative thoughts that come into my life.
How you train your brain to think and the mindset you end up with is the true key to happiness. After all, you are only thinking about being happy or sad and depressed. It’s a thought. Therefore you can change everything through sheer mindset.
You will actually come to the realization that what you may ‘think’ is wrong and what is ‘actually wrong’ will be 2 completely different things.
This way you can look at a problem and think “Ah, I am only sad because _____. I can fix that by just _____.”
Let’s consider your brain and happiness as the engine of your body like it’s a car.
If your car suddenly stopped working and you don’t know a single thing about cars… you think all is doomed and you possibly blew your engine!
You think you might have to spend a couple grand to get a new engine and fix it.
But if you understand how things work in your engine, you can easily think of and find the solutions to fix your problem.
Then bam, all along it was just the $40 starter or the $60 battery. Problem fixed.
This is the power in understanding how happiness works inside of your mind.
Choose To Be Happy
Before you learn how to be happy you have to choose to be happy. You have to want happiness in your life.
I can assume since you are here now you are ready for some change in your life.
This is the first step. Happiness or Unhappiness. It’s really that simple!
Physiology For Happiness
Your brains chemistry will react to anything your body does.
For instance, if you smile super hard for 15 seconds, your brain suddenly surges with serotonin and that makes you happy.
This is science… I’m not making this up. Same thing happens when you look sad or depressed.
Slouching over and having bad posture also hurts your happiness. But standing upright and putting your chin up actually makes you more confident and happy instantly.
Others see you as more confident too because the human brain knows what that body language means.
I smile as much as I can and make sure to keep great posture. It adds to my happiness daily! Give it a try right now!
Learn How To Be Happy By Ignoring Negativity
Here is a big part of that engine I mentioned.
Do you often get sad when a negative thought crosses your mind? Maybe something someone said about you or a way that you feel about yourself?
Maybe you feel fat or ugly and that makes you sad?
Well honestly, you are over thinking it. Over thinking always leads to negative thoughts.
You need to learn how to live in this moment and how to recognize a negative thought when they pop into your mind so that you can block them.
Whenever I used to get depressed it was because one negative thought led to another and then another and then another and it ruined my entire day.
This would happen for weeks and even months sometimes. I wouldn’t have motivation for anything and I wouldn’t even want to get out of bed.
This is true depression. I had to learn how to be happy or I could have been stuck like that forever.
A Book The Changed My Life And Happiness
A great book that completely changed my life and helped me understand everything I mentioned above is The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle
This book will help you so so much! I promise! I have read it 6 times now.
I re read it to refresh my mind on how to stay in the moment and remain happy by understanding what the human mind truly is.
It teaches you how to live in the moment and that your past thoughts and thoughts about the future don’t even exist. The only thing that exist is this moment right now.
And when you learn to the flick the switch and live in the moment now, you are always happy because pain only exist in your thought process.
Sounds crazy right? This book changed my life and showed me how to be happy much much more with just one simple understanding of presence.
If you don’t believe me… This book is a New York Times best seller and has sold millions of copies for a reason.
Hormones Affect Your Emotions And Happiness
Here is another piece of that engine we talked about.
Sometimes it’s not you, sometimes other things are at work affecting your happiness.
Realize that there isn’t really anything wrong in your life. But your hormones have a huge affect on your emotions like happiness.
If you can start understanding that maybe your hormones are out of wack, you can realize you’re not really unhappy, but your hormones are a bit out of control at this moment.
Instead of asking “Why am I so sad?!” You can look at it from the right perspective and that will allow you to rationalize any unhappiness that isn’t truly real.
Tricks I’ve Learned Help Me To Be Happy
When you are confident with who you are, you are happier.
That means you need to become the best version of yourself so you truly believe in who you are, your capabilities and what you can and will become.
When I started listening to audio books, reading articles, chasing goals and finding the motivation to relentlessly chase my dreams, I became happier.
All of those little things that make you stronger physically, mentally and spiritually give you more belief in yourself. It increases confidence like nothing else will because it is YOUR LIFE and you know you are doing the most you can with it and that my friend, brings incredible happiness.
When you are can be the best YOU that you can be, you will feel happier everyday and once every single day of your life you are living to grow yourself and get closer to your dreams and goals or just the goal of being a better you, you will be happy.
It’s making YOU better.
Invest in yourself. So you feel smarter and more in control in your life. Read books that expand your knowledge.
Set Goals And Organize Your Life
One thing I have truly found keeps me happy is heading towards that next mile stone. What is my goal? What am I living and striving for? Where are am I heading in life?
Chasing the dream takes your mind off of the negative and potential downward spiral you will face if you don’t know the right path for your life.
And when you find your life purpose and get on the right path, you are happy.
Change Your Friends To Be Happy
I just had a phone call last night with a girl who has a friend full of drama. She called me and brought her drama into my life. I don’t need hear that. I have 0 worries and no problems. Last thing I need is to allow someone else who hasn’t changed their life to enter my life and start affecting me with their problems.
I talked to her for 10 minutes about how she needs to change her friend group and how that would drastically change her happiness.
After making a bunch of valid points, she agreed with me.
It’s hard enough to try to change yourself at first. Don’t get the idea that maybe you can change your friends.
It’s time to get new friends.
Have you ever heard the saying that you are the equivalent of the 5 people you hang around the most?
It’s is absolutely true. Imagine how you would feel if you always hung out with happy, upbeat, super positive minded people all the time!?
Don’t you think that would rub off on you A LOT! You’re dang right it would!
Change Your Environment To Be Happier
If where you live is a terrible environment and the people who live there are just dragging you down and eating your energy. You need to escape and get yourself into a place where you can actually feel comfortable enough to be happy.
Not all of us can just get up and leave the place we live or the job we have but what we can do is plan and work for your escape from it.
Work on everything else I mention here and all at the same time plan your escape for freedom.
Be Optimistic To Find Happiness
If you’re looking for the bad in things, you are bound to find the bad. So isn’t it the same when you’re looking for the good?
Look for the good in things and you will actually find them.
When you rewire your mind to start trying to find reasons to like things instead of dislike them, you will notice you are suddenly more happy because you are seeing so much good in the world. ?
I great way that I started trying to find the good in things as well as a way to make friends and get better people skills, is that I try to genuinely compliment something about people I see on the street.
I say things such as “Nice T shirt!” or “Love those shoes man!”. It brightens their day and you have just broke a little more out of your shell.
Build Happiness Through Confidence
When you are confident, you are happier.
If you want to learn how to be happy you simply need to increase your confidence.
Well the first thing I am going to recommend is that you get in shape. When you go to the gym you not only start looking better but you start feeling better.
Your body starts adapting itself to be healthier for your survival. It also cranks out endorphins that make you happy every single time you exercise.
Then when you are exercising more you will also start eating better.
When you are eating better foods you are less tired, more full of energy and more motivated to do things!
That sounds like the complete opposite of the depression we talked about earlier doesn’t it? ?
Add Some Happy By Getting Some Sun
Depressed people don’t go outside much therefore they stay a bit more depressed.
Get out there and get some sunlight. A bit of sun on your skin increases vitamin D and also makes you happier.
You only need a few minutes of sun for maximum effect.
Knock out 2 birds with one stone and go on a nice 5 minute walk for exercise AND sun.
Learn That Material Things Won’t Make You Happy
If all it took was money to be happy then Bill Gates wouldn’t stop smiling. His cheeks would always hurt. lol
Think about that for a second.
Yea, right when you get the new clothes, the new TV or the new car you are super excited and feel happy in the moment.
But that feeling fades. You don’t want your happiness to be based on external items that you can lose at anytime.
You want to learn how to be happy and stay happy because you love yourself and you don’t need anything but you to be happy.
If you base your happiness around material things you will just constantly be on the hunt for more and more material things to cover your pain.
Shopping therapy doesn’t really work for long term happiness.
Enjoy The Journey By Being Happy
If I have learned one thing it is that when the big goal comes, I don’t suddenly get MORE happy. As much as you think that reaching your goal will give you immense happiness, it wont.
The happiness comes from knowing you are on the right path and heading towards bigger and bigger goals.
The key is to be happy while on your purpose’s journey (once you find it, because we all have one)
You will learn more, experience more, understand the world more and realize why it is so important to be happy. Eventually that neuroplasticity we talked about will leave your brain in a place where you can’t even conceive negative thoughts or you can’t even stand them because the happiness shines so hard in your life.
I can promise you that.
It’s Takes Time To Find Happiness
No one likes waiting, I know! Trust me, haha.
But anything worth having is worth working for! And we are talking about your happiness here so it’s absolutely worth it.
Like I spoke about above in the neuroplasticity part of how to be happy, your brain rewires itself to be happier and happier the more that you think and choose to do so.
I started at rock bottom very depressed, sad and angry at life. Then over time I learned more and more on how to immediately change my attitude and be happier and happier.
There WILL come a point where you know how to be happy at the flip of a switch.
A point in your life where happiness is a normal daily routine for you.
But you have to choose and learn how to be happy everyday until it becomes ingrained in your personality and soul.
Life is an adventure and you need to enjoy as much of it as you can
I do a series called Life Lessons where I tell you things I have learned in my life that I wish I knew when I was younger and things I will teach my kids as soon as I can. You can check out those videos that I release weekly by going to the Life Lessons part of this site.
I know they will inspire you to be happy and change your life in little ways that all add up to big things.
I do daily word of day and inspiring and motivational post on both my SnapChat (iamnov) and Instagram. Hit me with a follow and I’ll help you learn how to be happy a little bit more everyday.
– Your friend, Rob Level